Woman Going on Vacation Without Husband Applauded: ‘No Need To Compromise’

A woman who decided to go on a planned vacation without her husband has been backed over her decision to leave him at home.

In a post shared to Reddit under the handle u/Strong-Farm-7377, a user claiming to be a 29-year-old married woman explained the circumstances that led her to ditch her husband and head off on a solo trip away.

It’s a decision that drew a furious response from her partner, who had expected her to cancel. However, many commenting on social media felt she was entirely justified in doing so, given the circumstances.

A vacation away with a partner can offer a rare opportunity to rekindle the romance that first brought them together. A survey of 2,000 U.S. adults conducted by SWNS on behalf of travel company Beachbound found 77 percent of respondents saw holidays as a chance to keep the spark alive in their relationship.

The majority of those surveyed said traveling was more fun with a loved one (78 percent) while the same percentage would postpone a vacation if a loved one was unable to make it.

That was what this woman’s 32-year-old husband had been hoping she would do when it came to their week-long vacation to New Orleans. However, she had other ideas.

“Back in March, I told him I would plan most of it, where to go, and what to do,” she said. “I spent the last few months researching what to do. I booked the hotel room, made reservations at places we wanted to try, I made a list of all the sites I wanted to see.”

All he had to do was book the week off and buy their plane tickets. Yet every time she asked if he had, he told her he was “waiting for the plane ticket prices to go down.”

Matters came to a head last week. “I asked if he had bought them yet and he said no. We looked again and the prices were still high,” she said. “He said he wasn’t willing to spend that much on them and asked how much money I would lose if I just canceled everything instead.”

Despite him suggesting they had a “nice staycation” instead, he she told him she was “not willing to cancel everything because I spent so much time planning it.”

As a result, she ended up flying out on her own, with her husband left shocked and angry that she “didn’t want to stay home with him.”

Commenting on the dilemma, Ranesha Especto, a licensed professional counselor at Thriveworks, a nationwide provider of in-person and online therapy services, told Newsweek it was perfectly acceptable for couples to take separate vacations “as long as they are discussed openly with both feeling comfortable.”

“While it is important to each have independence, a relationship is two people coming together and now operating as a unit. Both have to be happy and in agreement to keep things smooth,” she said.

“I wouldn’t say that a couple taking separate vacations is necessarily a sign of them drifting apart. I think the couple should look at intentions, and consider communication. What is my intention with this trip without my spouse? Is it a girls trip? A work retreat? A solo self-care trip? Lastly, have I communicated this with my spouse? Are they comfortable with how long I’m going to be away for, how far away I’m traveling and how much communication I’ll be be able to commit to once I’m gone.”

In this instance, Especto felt that the wife clearly decided a break was needed due to her husband’s actions. “Relationships are all about give and take. If there is any moment where a person is taking more than giving or vice versa, they need to take a moment and re-evaluate things with their partner,” she said.

Many commenting on Reddit concurred that the woman had been right to continue on with her plans for a vacation. “Make sure to have a great holiday,” one user wrote. “I wish I could go on holiday on my own without kids and hubby! For once, no need to compromise and just do wtf I want!”

Another said: “I don’t know if he deliberately sabotaged the trip or just didn’t care enough to follow through on his tiny piece of things, but you were absolutely right to not let him ruin the trip for you, and be sure as hell shouldn’t be booking an expensive plane ticket to come join you now.”

A third added: “Weaponized incompetence with a side of financial manipulation. What a charmer.”

Newsweek has contacted u/Strong-Farm-7377 for comment.

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